A Crying Shame
According to the Myers-Briggs Personality Type indicator I am an ENTJ. When I first completed the inventory, I was almost off the scale in the T and the J categories.
So what does this mean? Being a strong T indicates that I tend to look at things very logically. I am not a touchy-feely kind of person. Do you remember Spock in Star Trek? He was from the planet Vulcan. Vulcans were void of emotion – they dealt with issues and problems using pure logic. Personal feelings did not get in the way of making decisions. I would fit in well there.
One noon hour I was making my way back to my classroom. As I rounded the corner I noticed only one person in the corridor. It was Kate, one of my grade 11 students. She was mid-way down the hall and sitting with her back against a locker. As I neared I noticed she was crying. OH NO, I so did not want to get involved with any drama, but I was going to walk past her. It would be hard to ignore the crying.
I don’t recall exactly what day it was but I know it wasn’t a Tuesday or Thursday or alternate Friday. Those were the days our half-time guidance counsellor was in the building.
“Kate, are you okay?”
She shuddered, “Nooooooo”, managing to stretch the word into 5 syllables.
“Do you have someone to talk to?”
“Noooooooooooo.” She stretched that one into six or seven syllables.
If it was only a Tuesday, Thursday or alternate Friday I could encourage her to make her way to the Guidance Office.
This was obviously a cry-out for attention. I bit the bullet.
“Would you like to talk about it?” Please say No, please say No.
“Okay”, she spoke while getting up. Oh well. Perhaps I could make a difference.
We walked to my room. I sat behind my desk and she sat in front.
“So, Kate, what’s going on? What has you so upset?”
“It’s Cassie. She called me a bitch.” Cassie was one of her best friends.
I decide I was going to approach this from a purely logical perspective. Through reasoning I would show her how she was over reacting to this situation.
I asked, “Is it true?”
“Is what true?”
“Are you a bitch?”
“Nooooooooooooo”, followed by even more sniffles.
“Then why are you crying? I know you are not a bitch. You know you are not a bitch. I doubt if Cassie thinks you are a bitch. I suspect she is mad about something and called you a bitch to make you upset ………. and it worked. You are sitting here crying
“You guys are good friends. In two days you will be best buds once again, but you have chosen the wrong emotion for this situation.”
Spock would understand exactly what I was saying. I don’t think Kate did.
I forget how the conversation ended. When she left she didn’t look any happier but, at least, the crying stopped.
There is a reason I wasn’t a guidance counsellor – wrong planet.
Oh, and regarding Cassie, now THERE was a bitch.
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